Sometimes we’re not making love—we’re making a case. A case for being lovable, desirable, enough. A case for being chosen. We undress, not just to be seen, but to be validated—as if pleasure, or performance, could convince someone to stay. This is the sex we have to prove we’re worthy. And it’s more common than we think. ????

We can be naked, close, even entangled— and still feel miles away from honesty. We may long for a slower rhythm, a firmer grip, a softer tone— but stay silent. We might crave more presence, more play, or more aftercare— but we swallow the words. In bed, the place where we should feel most free, we often feel most afraid to speak. But why?

We’re taught how to solve equations, diagram sentences, and write résumés. We’re taught how to say no, how to be polite, how to stay safe. But very few of us are ever taught how to experience pleasure. Not perform it. Not fake it. Not fear it. But feel it—honestly, fully, in our own bodies. This is the invisible curriculum. The things we

Desire is natural. Instinctive. Human. And yet for so many—especially women, queer people, and trauma survivors—desire feels dangerous. Wanting is wrapped in fear, self-doubt, shame. We don’t just long for someone. We long for permission to long. But what if wanting wasn’t something we had to earn, silence, or apologize for? What if desire

Sometimes, the most painful distance between people isn’t physical— It’s the space created by what goes unsaid. The quiet moments when needs rise to the surface, But never find their way into words. We want to be held, but we don’t ask. We want to feel safe, but we don’t say how. We want to be touched, seen, reassured— But we remain si